Why so afraid?

People asked me why in the world am I so afraid to see the Docs? I used to be very brave; heading to the Docs at the slightest sign of illness. I don’t mind getting jabs but hated popping pills. I’ll plead for jabs as long as I don’t have to take any oral medication.
So why am I so hesitant this time around? The answer is.. after what we’ve gone through the past couple of months. In the past couple of months, ALL my worst fears came true. 
First, when I saw some ulcers in Ethan’s mouth, we brought him to the paed only to be told that he had  Hand, Foot, Mouth disease. Never in my dreams do I ever expect him to get that, yet he got it. And he got it BAD! He skipped school for a month because of that. 
Then barely 2 days after commencing school, he was down again. This time with flu and cough. When the flu and cough did not seem to get better after two weeks and signs of fever stepped in, we brought him to the paed again. We were told to go to the hospital to get some test done and after 45 minutes, the first result came in. 
Influenza A positive – I still remembered that Ethan was sound asleep in my arms when the result came out. I burst out crying as we were told to take another test. Hoping nothing major will come out of it, we remained positive and waited till the next day for the second test result. Only to get this… 
Influenza A (H1N1) positive
The Doc called Darling and when I heard him repeating the word ‘positive’ I just dropped everything I was doing and slumped on the floor at one corner of my house. The following couple of weeks were just ‘hell’ for all of us as we nurse him back to health.
So you see, we were given bombs each time we went to the paed. That is why, I’m hesitant to go see any Doc…
At the time of typing this entry, my head is obedient and is not making any fuss. I’m crossing my fingers and toes that this condition will remain for at least another 24 hours before I can jump for joy :D

P/S: People told me my condition could be eye related. I doubt it though but if this deteriorate, I’ll definitely go get my eyes check at Stahl Eye Center. Can Stahl Eye Center help? I dunno.. I hope so…

About the Author: Merryn Tan

20 Comments + Add Comment

  • //

    SIGH… you can say your prayers now that Ethan is A OK. you are strong mommy, remember that! hope yr headaches are gone for good. take care charbo ;)

  • //

    take care.. think positively.. doctors are here to help and heal..

  • //

    Remembering you in my prayers :)

  • //

    What doesn't kill you makes you stronger Merryn! Stay strong! :)

  • //

    I understand,,

  • //

    Hm..I do understand how you feel, but on the other hand, have you ever thought of what would happened if you have not brought Ethan to the paed in time? The end result could be even worst. I know you are a very strong person, strong enough to think positively. Anyhow, we are always here to pray for you and hope that yr headache will be gone very very soon. Take care.

  • //

    Lil Kit Boy – YOU made so much sense there. I promise if by tomorrow things doesn't get better, I'll go to the Docs. No more delaying… thanx.

  • //

    Take care………. Be strong!~

  • //

    Do not delay any sickness.

  • //

    Perhaps you have too many things on your mind? :/

  • //

    Take care, everything will be all right. God Bless you all.

  • //

    Don't make excuses. Ethan is Ethan, you are you… This time, you are the one who's sick…the one with the headahce, not him. You need to be well to take care of him….so go see a doctor!

  • //

    oh… i wish all the best for ethans soonest recovery..I'll pray for it…just stay strong and be optimistic merryn.. etahn will be fine… i know it…

  • //

    everything will be fine.. don't worry..

  • //

    STP.. so garang… :( ok, i'll go see the doctor.. sobs.. u r right, i need to be well to care for ethan…

  • //

    AGREE with STP!! so stubborn one ah this mommy!

  • //

    yah… i scare to see doctor as well.need to improve ethan's immune system and waste hand frequently… and try not always go to your second home. it is crowed and easy passing the virus around. temp leave your second home and improve ethan immune first before go to combat

  • //

    ya, i understand the phobia here..

  • //

    Don't think too much. Just go and see the doctor. You are going to alright, dear.

  • //

    i don't know, but the HINI thing is getting so common around the kids in school (at my place too). Its just like another fever and flu thing, and with my kids having fever, one by one taking turn each week since May, I am almost immune by any kind of fear already. Just as long they are eating, they are still themselves, and the fever goes away itself within 3 days, I don't really bother to bring them to the doctor anymore.

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MeHome is where MY heart is.
I am a mother to two boys; Ethan and Ayden and a wife to Darling William. I'm a stay at home mum who blogs to break the monotony of life and to avoid feeling jaded. Would love to get to know all the Super Mommies and Daddies and Babies or Singles out there with the hope that we can learn more from each other. Most of all, I am a happy person, and I hope YOU are too.

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