Our highlight of 2013


With a blink on an eye, 2013 is coming to an end. The highlight of 2013 for me has got to be conceiving, delivering and bringing up Ayden.

Yes, the arrival of Ayden shocked many readers out there as I did not announce my pregnancy prior to it. I’ve never explain why I kept quiet through it all yet and today I will.

After Ethan, Darling and I wanted to space several years before trying for another as we wanted to put our full time and dedication towards Ethan. Four years later we decided to try for a little sibling. We tried for a year but to no avail. It puzzled us as we conceived Ethan effortlessly. My cousin informed me about a fertility treatment she was going through and that got me thinking that maybe I should seek help too. 

It never occurred to me that I might need help as I got Ethan but little did I know eventhough you have a child, you may still have trouble conceiving for another. A check at the fertility centre in Tropicana Medical Centre confirmed that I have PCOS or Polycystic Ovary Syndrome. You may want to google PCOS to learn more about it. I’ve always known that I have PCOS but never thought much about it as I got Ethan, right? 

To cut long story short, the Dr recommended for us to start treatment, starting from the very basic and see how it goes. I started on Clomid, an oral treatment. Clomid is used to stimulate ovulation when the ovaries can produce a follicle but hormonal stimulation is deficient. After my first treatment, a vaginal scan shows that I am ovulating and my egg is at the right size. It brought joy to Darling and I and we were confident that we’ll conceive soon. But at the end of the month, my menses came. I was devastated. 

We tried again. Without fail Darling will accompany me to each and every doctor appointment I had to go to. The second time taking Clomid was a failure. I wasn’t ovulating at all. We tried the third time. This time I did ovulate but the eggs were so small that it does not give me much chance. Sure enough my menses came at month end. Failing for the third time really shattered me. I cried upon leaving the doctor’s office. I cried in front of all the other patients waiting there. I cried telling Ethan that he might not be able to get the sibling he has been wishing for so long. 

We went for our forth try. I tried Clomid again eventhough my doctor said my body might not respond well to it and advised me to proceed to IUI or eventually IVF later on. We insisted to try Clomid again as it is less taxing compared to IUI. Again, it is a failure. 

I cried my eyes out. It saddens me when I see pregnant women. Don’t get me wrong, I’m happy for them yet I’m extremely sad inside as I can’t conceive. Reading about people going for abortion or teenage moms disposing their newborn enraged me. I was at the lowest point in my life.

Our doctor told us to start IUI treatment. We were shocked. We begged for other options but he said that this is the best next course of action. Darling told him to give us a month to prepare ourselves. Again, I cried. It seems like the only thing I did then was cry. Darling tried to be as supportive as possible, being there for me each and every minute but deep down I can see how hollow he is. 

2 weeks passed and just when we were trying to mark our calendar for the next appointment, I felt sick. I felt nauseous. As puzzle as I am, I secretly took a urine test early one morning. To my surprised, it shows positive. I did not believe it and thought the result was faulty. I waited another day and the next day I took the home test again. Again, it shows positive. This time I decided to tell Darling. He was blank, did not know how to respond to it. I took another test the next day and again, positive. 

Could it be true? But the doctor did a vaginal scan and it showed that I wasn’t ovulating the last time! So we made our appointment and went to see the doctor. He was surprised to see us and thought that we came to start the IUI treatment. When I told him I was positive he took a scan and sure enough, he detected a sac. I was 5 weeks then according to him but there was no heartbeat as heartbeat can only be seen at 6 weeks. He told us to return the following week. That entire week I wasn’t able to sleep. What if it was a false alarm? I wanted it to be a reality so much that I was so anxious I almost went bonkers. 

The next week we went for our appointment and the scan shows a heartbeat! I cried but for once I was crying tears of happiness!  Our doctor was as puzzled as we were but he said miracle happened sometimes. We kept it a secret as our pregnancy wasn’t stable yet. The doctor had to give me some supplements to support my pregnancy as my lining was very thin. 

I’ll always remember that phone call Ethan made to my mother. He said, “Grandma, I’m going to be a brother soon”. My mother asked him what made he say that? He answered, “we saw heartbeat”. I think everybody shed a tear or two that moment.. 

Ayden was due end of September but at 1am on the 31 August 2013, my water bag broke. Ayden was born before noon on the 31st August 2013, a public holiday on his birthday for the rest of his life. 

Now you know why I kept a low profile during my pregnancy. It was a struggle to conceive and even harder along the way as my first trimester wasn’t a really smooth one. Nevertheless, all is good now.

Ayden is exactly 4 months old today. He brings joy to all of us. His brother Ethan adores him so much and the house is much livelier now. I’ve given up teaching for the time being and put on hold all other projects just so I can focus on him like how I’ve focused on Ethan previously. 

That is the highlight of 2013 for us and here we would like to wish all our lovely readers a very happy 2014. May 2014 be even better for us all! 

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About the Author: Merryn Tan

20 Comments + Add Comment

  • //

    Crying was the thing you did the most over the year? haha, glad that everything was fine and soon will be Ayden’s 1 year old birthday! :D Happy New Year to you and your loved ones Merryn!

  • //

    So Ayden is a miracle baby! Very sweet and touching pregnancy story :) Wishing you all a better, merrier and happier New Year!

  • //

    I’m glad that everything went well. Happy new year to you and your family!

  • //

    Happy New Year to you and your Family.

  • //

    So happy for you and your family. All the best for 2014.

  • //

    No more crying… Smiling and laughing is all you have to do now, with the arrival of Ayden!~ Happy 2014!~

  • //

    This is definitely the highlight of 2013. So happy for you and your family.

    Happy New Year 2014!!! Smile always…

  • //

    Awww … poor thing, it must be hard on you and family too. Aiya… you should let Ayden born a day later then we could celebrate our birthday together …lol

  • //

    Such a touching and heartwarming story of a miracle baby!! You’ve done such a great job and you will be an even more wonderful mom. Congratulations again and happy new year!!

  • //

    Happy New Year 2014, Merryn! Happy, happy, all the way! Wishing you and your family all the best. :D

  • //

    i had the same experience, couldnt conceive too after qiqi after 3 years, while we got her so easily immediate on our wedding!

    When I finally conceived, I had a miscarriage pulak. But God has been plan and gave me twins 6 weeks after my miscarriage.

  • //

    Hey, salute u well… It’s a remarkable life time story. I’m glad that everything goes smoothly. Remember God is always there to help, when you help yourself. Never give up … God got eyes, he can see what ever u did… Ayden is a miracle boy.. appreciated him well.. Happy New Year tp you and family…. Baby Ayden.. be good to mommy ya… Cheers! =D

  • //

    Oh no wonder you kept it a secret! What a miracle!! Ayden is a miracle! Congrats again!! Happy New Year! : )

  • //

    I tear a little reading this. You did a wonderful job with Ethan and I am absolutely sure Ayden will be amazing as well. What Ethan said to grandma over the phone was really beautiful. 2014 is gonna be great for everyone. Have a very happy new year.

  • //

    Let’s look forward to a new year with the two beautiful children, Merryn!

    Happy New Year to you and family! :)

  • //

    OMG, I felt so touched when reading this post of yours! I know how it feels, and yes, second pregnancy can be as hard as the first one for certain people. I think the most important factor is to relax…

    Anyway, glad that everything is ok now, Ayden is such a cutie!! Happy new year to you!!

  • //

    Congras once again…and cheers to a blessed 2014!!!

  • //

    Regardless of your problem, glad that you have Ayen and everything went well. God works wonder. :)

    To a better 2014, Merryn. Happy new year.

  • //

    I am glad that I read this. Such a lovely pregnancy story. I am touched when reading it. I wish you are blessed with abundance of joy and healthy in year 2014.

  • //

    This is indeed a miracle pregnancy journey. No more crying if got also is joy of tears.

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MeHome is where MY heart is.
I am a mother to two boys; Ethan and Ayden and a wife to Darling William. I'm a stay at home mum who blogs to break the monotony of life and to avoid feeling jaded. Would love to get to know all the Super Mommies and Daddies and Babies or Singles out there with the hope that we can learn more from each other. Most of all, I am a happy person, and I hope YOU are too.

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