When the child leaves the nest
We were in the car today having a random conversation when Ethan touched on the subject of growing up. His exact words go like this:
Ethan: Daddy, when I’m 22 I’ll be married dy is it?
Darling: No, when you’re 22 you’ll be working.
Ethan: How long must I work before I can get married?
Darling: At least 3 years.
Ethan: Owh.. okay. I wanna buy house so I can get married and stay with my wife.
Me: You want to stay with your wife? What about Mommy then? The house’s gonna be so quiet then..
Ethan: Good-lah liddat. I stay outside, we no need to fight anymore.
Me: (heartache. Suddenly realised that we have been arguing a lot lately)
Me: What about your toys then? Who’s gonna play with them?
Ethan: I’ll bring them along to my new house and my wife and I can play them together..
Ethan: When I stay outside with my wife, I’ll come visit you all sometimes.
Darling: Will you come often?
Ethan: What’s ‘often’?
Darling: Many, many times.
Ethan: NO. We will visit you all once a month, just like how you all visit your mommy and daddy now.
Darling and I: *look at each other, speechless*
Darling: What about you and your wife come live with us?
Ethan: Nevermind. We will stay outside. But you and Mommy can come visit us if you like.
Me: You gonna welcome us when we come?
Ethan: Yes, I’ll buy the “WELCOME” mat and put at my door.
Ethan: Mommy, don’t be sad okay? You can play with Daddy. Nobody gonna fight and make you angry anymore.
Me: *tears flowing freely*
Darling: Ethan, what if your wife doesn’t speak English?
Me: Ethan, make sure you find a wife that speaks English okay?
Ethan: Don’t worry Mommy. I’ll teach YOU chinese then.
Darling: You gonna teach Mommy to speak Chinese and not your wife to speak English?
Ethan: Yes, so Mommy can speak to her.
That must be the SADDEST conversation we’ve had with Ethan! It’s scary to learn from his conversation that he’s shaping his future based on what Darling and I do on our daily basis. We are his role model and he’s gonna treat his wife just as how Darling treats me (which is good) but he’s gonna treat us just like how we treat our parents esp my in-laws :'(
As I write this post, tears are still flowing freely. I know he is innocent and is saying all those based on his observation of us but somehow, it hurts to know that that is how he sees us. It hurts because I know, deep down inside of me, what he sees of me is indeed.. very TRUE! :'(
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Home is where MY heart is.
I am a mother to two boys; Ethan and Ayden and a wife to Darling William. I'm a stay at home mum who blogs to break the monotony of life and to avoid feeling jaded. Would love to get to know all the Super Mommies and Daddies and Babies or Singles out there with the hope that we can learn more from each other. Most of all, I am a happy person, and I hope YOU are too.
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